I love my girlfriend but i can't get over the fact she lost her virginity to someone else. Advice?

Me and my girlfriend started dating since we were in our early teens and for the longest time it was great but we ended up getting into a big argument and splitting up and not talking for about 3 years. We only recently just got back together and at first it was perfect until she hit me with the bombshell that she had lost her virginity to another guy. I know this might sound petty but it hurt allot to hear. She had always promised me when we we're kids that if i asked her to marry me i could be her first. What's worse is i know the guy she slept with and he had a history of stabbing me in the back already so i already hated the guy even before this. She claims it's a mistake but still i can't get over it. I think she's noticing it bothering me because she keeps telling me that if something is bothering me to tell her but i don't know how to even talk about it without hurting her feelings. I've known her for most of my life and she's one of the most beautiful women I've ever met so letting go isn't that easy but i'm still torn between my feelings for her and my burning hatred for this dude. I was planning on making her my wife before she dropped this bombshell on me but now i don't know what i want. Advice?



You describe immaturity, yours, so time to grow a pair, and get over something that will never change. If the girl is actually interested in you, as her choice in a relationship, grow up, before she flips you off, as a loser.

You're very immature. Just because your blood relative passed away does NOT mean you get to treat the supposed love of your life badly! ... I bet she was just trying to comfort you but instead you told her to "fvck off"! You get what you deserve in this case and you have NO right to be mad at the person she lost her virginity to. You treated her badly like as if she did not have any feelings at all! You could have just told her that you were going through arough time emotionally and then to KINDLY tell her to leave you alone for awhile, but NO you didn't! ... At the same time, maybe yeah she could have understood where you came from, but maybe what else could she do since she was hurt by you rejecting her?! Did you not expect her to get hurt?! If she slept with your friend (mutual?) because she started liking this person, then you have no right to dictate what they did while you two were broken up. Grow up. Not a lot of things in life will go your way. If you love her like you claim you do, you will FORGIVE her for doing what she did. Maybe she was just in a vulnerable time in her life at that time. She is beautiful so obviously she is going to have a lot of suitors. You should understand that! You don't have that right to dictate or to control people or be possessive really, especially since you two weren't together at the time that they did those things. Maybe you should have tried harder to contact her before the three years if you liked her THAT much and was sorry about shooing her off!


Dude, you are a caring and sensitive person. Don't try to hurt yourself and your love life. Just tell her all about that guy and move on. You both people care for each other. Both of you are known to each other. So don't put any blame on her as we don't know the situation how she hooked with that person.

You have to get over that man.

Really think for a while. Do you love the thought of her or do you love her. She didn’t cheat on you and it sucks that ahe didn’t wait but three years is a long time. Not everyone waits. I was a virgin when I met my boyfriend and he had sex with a couple people. It hurt a little because something like that is special and should be saved yet it’s 2019 and not everyone has the same views. Just think then talk to her about it. Was it a one night stand or was it a relationship. Just talk to her after you think and maybe even beforehand talk to someone else first about it.

So if you had an opportunity to have sex with another woman would you wait for your ex? If you did you are out of touch of reality. Wise up dude because all woman are seeking the alpha Male to have sex with. You might wanna step your game up to have an advantage against other men who are thirsting to smash your girl.

It's always something huh.

You were in your early teens 3 yrs ago so are you what like 18 now? Grow up. You were not her husband. She promised you her virginity as a silly kid. You did not marry her so it's whatever. Both of you are not virgins. Both of you should have waited for marriage but you didn't. The past is the past. You claim she "is the most beautiful women ever" so shut up or find someone else.